Girl Walks Into an Outlet Mall
Only in Texas would a massive, shade-free shopping center with tons of upscale discount stores be the state’s fourth most popular tourist attraction. (And in San Marcos, no less.) But enough of my spin. Where are the best bargains? Who has the coolest stuff? How do you stay hydrated? And—most important—what should you do with your husband?
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Where to find sustenance?
EITHER PACK IT IN OR LOAD UP at the Starbucks on the other side of I-35. Otherwise, you can walk for days and still not work off the calories consumed at the malls’ many fast-food joints. Hydration is a must. There is a plethora of drink machines scattered throughout the property for a reason. Avail yourself consistently if the temperature has surpassed 75 degrees or you will find yourself stumbling and mumbling insanely like Ralph Fiennes in the darkest parts of The English Patient. Worse, you might buy something under duress. Never a good idea.
The biggest surprise?
THE BOOKSTORES. Usually these are the dogs of outlet malls, stocked as they are with books remaindered for good reason. While the Borders store in Tanger and the Book Warehouse store in Prime had their share of tomes by Al Roker and Ari Fleischer, there were also plenty of good reads. Borders offered old Clive Cussler and Nicholas Sparks novels in hardback for $5.99 each. Book Warehouse was more literary, offering a hardback of Douglas Brinkley’s The Boys of Pointe du Hoc for $4.99 and an audio version of Michael Lewis’s The New New Thing for $6.
I have only one hour. Where should I shop?
IF YOU ARE PRIMARILY interested in household goods, head straight for the Pottery Barn outlet. It’s the size of the Parthenon and has not just standard Pottery Barn fare but also discounted merchandise from its cousin companies Williams-Sonoma, West Elm, and Pottery Barn Kids. This means that in one store you can find terrific discounts on glassware, furniture, cooking oils, bedding, desk accessories, and the like. I was particularly enamored of a tall, darkly stained cabinet with glass doors, as well as a brown linen armchair— both marked down to around $875 from $1,899. A plush, olive-hued $3,300 sectional sofa was only $1,200, and a wonderfully upholstered bed—Jean Harlow or Clark Gable would have loved it—was $1,600, down from $3,300. An elegant mohair easy chair was marked down from $1,900 to $1,049. This is a great place to shop for wedding, graduation, or baby gifts in bulk: Wooden salad bowls were around $27 instead of $32, and a superhip Dualit toaster was $69.99 instead of $219.95.
I have only three hours. Where should I shop?
MY VOTE GOES TO THE FAUX PIAZZA at the northernmost tip of Prime Outlets. This area contains many of the European imports that fashionistas crave—Furla, Ferragamo, Lacoste, Zegna, Hugo Boss—but is still within walking distance to Pottery Barn, Restoration Hardware, and Crate & Barrel. More expensive? Yes. But better quality.
Whom should I shop with?
ANECDOTAL EVIDENCE SUGGESTS that by far the best shopping companion is your mother or your daughter, provided the latter is over the age of eleven (see opposite page). Given the plethora of near-catatonic men collapsed on benches in both malls, the worst person to bring along is a husband. Metrosexuals can be appeased somewhat; dispatch them to Little Italy (Hugo Boss, Ferragamo) as well as nearby Brooks Brothers, Johnston & Murphy, and Cole Haan. Exile gearheads to the Sony or Bose stores (where the latter’s prices on the noise-canceling $249 and $349 headphones are exactly what they are everywhere else). The best place to send red-meat types is the Coleman store, the only such store in the state and one with enough camping equipment to outfit both Attila the Hun and Marco Polo. Some of the stock—a $500 gas grill sufficiently big enough to cook for an entire Scout Jamboree—is seriously marked down, and the rest is merely reasonably priced. (A salesman explained that Coleman doesn’t offer deeper discounts because it cannot afford to undercut major retail channels in the area, like Wal-Mart and Academy.) One benefit of this particular shopping plan is that the Sony and Bose stores are in Prime, while the Coleman store is in Tanger. Visiting all three could take a while. If your he-man shows up too soon, tell him that the Brooks Brothers store sells boxer shorts for $16 a pair, or three for $42. That should buy you at least another hour of shopping.
Where’s the best place to find bargains?
GO DIRECTLY TO the back of the store—any store. This was as true at Pottery Barn as it was at Michael Kors. (Who cares if it’s last year’s cashmere when it’s marked down from $595 to $69.99? Not me.)
Too good to be true?
ALWAYS READ the fine print. I was just about to go wild buying OPI nail polish, which was listed at $1.99 a bottle at the Head 2 Toe Beauty Outlet. Then I noticed the words “available with a $50 purchase.” Otherwise it was $7.49 a bottle. At goddess-within.com it was on sale for $5.
Anything missing?
THE DONNA KARAN store, not to be confused with DKNY Jeans, closed more than three years ago. Amazing designer overstock, dirt cheap. R.I.P.
Saks Off Fifth or Neiman’s Last Call?
OFF FIFTH HAD A FEW spectacular buys and very little junk, and it’s organized in a way that doesn’t induce migraines. Neiman’s is more muddled but also had spectacular buys. It comes down to how much you enjoy searching for (potentially) buried treasure. At Neiman’s, for instance, I scoured the racks and found a Jean Paul Gaultier jacket that began life at $1,520 and was marked down to $190. Alas, it was a size 4, which I am not. Neiman’s also had better Anne Klein selections than the Anne Klein outlet itself, along with Valentino, YSL, and Piazza Sempione. Saks, on the other hand, had lovely Burberry ensembles ($229, down from $635), as well as Hollywould (once $4,000, now $1,400), Gucci, and Piazza all in plain sight. Both stores had an impressive array of Jil Sander at substantial discounts, a clue that allowing the designer to abandon her own label—again—was not a good idea.
Kids?
MY FEELING IS that an outlet mall is no place for children under eleven who have not yet learned to consume like bloodthirsty hyenas. Judging from the number of strollers occupied by very cranky toddlers, however, large numbers of people seem to disagree with me. Are you there to shop or babysit? If you have no choice but to bring the kids, it might be best to bring a sitter too and send him or her and your progeny to Prime’s curiously truncated gondola ride. Kids under three ride for free, and they’ll most likely pass out quickly from the lack of shade.
Should I cultivate salespeople?
THINK CELEBRITIES and socialites are the only people with personal shoppers? Think again. I was practically lassoed and hog-tied by one Yuriko Cranford in the Kenneth Cole store—but hey, if she calls me with a heads-up on sales, do I care? Ask for their cards, get their names, and send them flowers. They will let you know when new shipments come in. Trust me. This is how Lynn Wyatt does it.
Parking?
BOTH MALLS ARE SOMEWHAT circular in shape, with vast parking lots in the center. But Prime has additional parking in the back, which allows for easier entry and departure at peak hours. Prime and Tanger also have free trolley systems to ferry shoppers from place to place. My favorite spot: behind the food court at Prime. But I guess now that I’ve told you about it, I’ll have to let it go.
The saddest truth?
EXPENSIVE GOODS ARE STILL expensive, even when they’re discounted. I liked the $800 Python pumps at the Cole Haan store more when they had been marked down to $500, but at that price, they still didn’t qualify as a steal. Ditto the Ferragamo bag marked down from $1,390 to $905 and the suede slacks at the Polo store marked down from $525 to $399. Maybe those sound like bargains to you, but I’m still waiting for the final markdowns.
A Grand Time
What if someone offered you $1,000 to go crazy at the outlets? That’s just what happened to me when my boss called with what, in my book, was an offer I couldn’t refuse. Here are my exceedingly personal, entirely capricious choices.
Black T-shirt, sweater, and overcoat at the Lacoste store: $345
Slow cooker at Pottery Barn: $99.99 ($50 less than retail and $50 less than at Target. Also available at Tanger’s Kitchen Collection for the same price.)
Two pillow cases at Pottery Barn: $15.98 ($7.99 each)
Five place mats at Pottery Barn: $29.95 ($5.99 each)
Two grass “Checkers chairs” from Crate & Barrel: $450 ($225 each)
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$940.92
or
Two lavender spindle soaps from L’Occitane: $7 (regularly $4.90 each)
Six stemless wine glasses at Crate & Barrel: $11.70 ($1.95 each)
Tote from Hartmann: $111 (regularly $185)
Four-person pack-away camping table at The Coleman store: $94.99
Leather jacket from Ferragamo: $559 (20 percent off)
Three dress shirts from Brooks Brothers: $154
Seersucker jacket from Brooks Brothers: $139 (regularly $239)
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$1,076.69
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