Robert Durst

GEA

GALVESTON EMPLOYMENT AGENCY

Dear Robert Durst,

Recently, following your acquittal on charges of murder by shooting your neighbor, hacking up his body, and dumping his torso into Galveston Bay in a plastic bag, you applied for work at our office. Below, please find a list of jobs from our files that seem suitable to your unique "skills."

* Brisket slicer, Goode Company Barbeque

* Hatchet man, office of Karl Rove

* Male lead, So I Married an Axe Murderer II

* Body parts supervisor, University of Texas Medical Branch

* Celebrity pitchman, Hefty garbage bags

* Caddy for O. J. Simpson

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