When I first read that University of Texas redshirt freshman quarterback Connor Brewer had been arrested early Saturday morning for public intoxication and possessing a fictitious drivers license, I couldn't help but think, "that kid's gonna win the Heisman!"
Then, upon realizing that Brewer wasn't busted in a Sixth Street bar by city cops, but by University of Texas police officers, my second thought was, "that kid's gonna be in 'Campus Watch!'"
As regular readers of our previous TM Daily Post feature know, UT's police blotter infamously lards its federally-mandated, public safety-conscious record of campus crime with deadpan humor and occasional flights of verbal fancy, making it a cult favorite read for students, Texas Exes, Austin residents and Horns-haters alike.
Of course, the officers who write it probably know better than to make fun of a Longhorns quarterback. And really, Brewer didn't give them all that much to work with--just your garden variety underage over-drinking.
The 19 year-old Arizona native is not actually identified in the item, but the charges, and the fact that he was booked into the Travis County jail at 2:49 a.m., means this is clearly him:
2100 BLOCK WHITIS AVE
Public Intoxication / Fictitious License: A UT Police Officer observed a UT student staggering and stumbling as he attempted to walk. The student stumbled across the street and was able to use a rock retaining wall to help maintain his balance. During the investigation, the officer detected a strong odor of alcohol on the student's breath and learned the student was under the legal age of 21. The student presented the officers with an ID card but was not able to verify any of the information on it. Due to the student level of intoxication, he was taken into custody for Public Intoxication. The officers later learned the ID card presented to them was counterfeit. The student was charged with Public Intoxication / Fictitious License and transported to Central Booking. Occurred on: 2-02-13, at 1:50 AM.
I'll presume that when he's sober, Brewer can remember the checkdown sequence on a pass play better than he could the name on his ID.
UT head coach Mack Brown issued a statement on the incident.
We're aware of Connor's situation and are disappointed any time one of our players is accused of wrongdoing. We've talked with his family and will continue to monitor the situation. Following the completion of the legal process, we will do what's best for The University, Connor and the team. We've always prided ourselves in our program's family atmosphere, and this will be handled within our family.
SOP for the insular culture of a college football locker room. Though you never know, perhaps the Board of Regents will decide to get involved.
- 1 week