Burkablog »
And now a discussion that really matters (Fri Nov 20 at 5:02 PM)
In the Pink »
The Wrecking Coup (Fri Nov 20 at 1:33 PM)
Page Break »
Supreme Court to Rehear Exxon Case. Yes, That Exxon Case. (Sat Nov 21 at 1:45 PM)
Eat My Words »
Talking Tamales (Thu Nov 12 at 11:12 AM)
Alan says: I am in favor of limiting the governor to two consecutive terms. But blacklisting someone after eight years altogether, regardless of how good or bad they did their job, can needlessly force an effective public official out of public service. Many state governors throughout history have served well over eight years without their constituents regretting it. I would point out that such a system is wholly unworkable in twenty-first century America: we live in the era of the permanent campaign and the 24-hour news cycle. A governor facing re-election every other year would essentially do nothing but fundraise (which is close to what most do anyway even with four-year terms). (November 19th, 2009 at 11:09pm)
Stories on Humor
Sarah Bird: Podcast »
Sarah Bird reads “Hedda Garbler.”
[December 2009]
Offering Fine Advice Since 2007 »
Can I wear a football jersey to church?
by David Courtney [December 2009]
One Angry Woman »
Am I the only person who has always wanted to get picked for jury duty?
by Sarah Bird [November 2009]
Offering Fine Advice Since 2007 »
What’s to be done with annoying neighbors?
by David Courtney [November 2009]
Sarah Bird: Podcast »
Sarah Bird reads “One Angry Woman.”
by [November 2009]
Short Cuts »
Everything you ever wanted to know about the Texas governor’s race—in under three minutes.
by [November 2009]
Rats! »
Turns out being a test subject for a dermatology research lab is not the best thing that could ever happen to a girl.
by Sarah Bird [October 2009]
Offering Fine Advice Since 2007 »
Can I unfriend a Facebook friend?
by David Courtney [October 2009]
Sarah Bird: Podcast »
Sarah Bird reads “Rats!”
by [October 2009]
Mammary Dearest »
It was the breast of times, it was the worst of times.
by Sarah Bird [September 2009]
Offering Fine Advice Since 2007 »
Will hiring a yard guy make me soft?
by David Courtney [September 2009]
The Texanist Unleashed »
Will hiring a lawn service to do my mowing make me soft?
[September 2009]
Under Cover »
Editor Jake Silverstein introduces the September 2009 issue.
[September 2009]
Ranch Blessing »
Or, how I stopped worrying and learned to love my formerly ugly, recently hip, linoleum-clad, mid-mod house.
by Sarah Bird [August 2009]
Offering Fine Advice Since 2007 »
Does keeping a found twelve-pack of beer constitute stealing?
by David Courtney [August 2009]
Offering Fine Advice Since 2007 »
Propane or charcoal?
by David Courtney [July 2009]
Sweater Weather »
Yes, it’s summer in Texas. It’s the summer to end all summers (please, God), with record-breaking heat, triple-digit temperatures, and the uncontrollable urge to sit in your freezer, atop the Häagen-Dazs bars.
by Eileen Smith [July 2009]
The Texanist Unleashed »
Charcoal or propane?
[July 2009]
Gomer And Me »
You’ll never guess how I came to break bread with TV’s best-loved Marine.
by Kinky Friedman [May 2009]
Circle of Influenza »
If you need an example of how the world can change in an instant, here is a small blow by blow.
by Mimi Swartz [May 2009]
Dreams from My Father »
How my dad learned to stop worrying and love a Democrat.
by Eileen Smith [February 2009]
Confessions of a Working Mom »
Every once in a while, it all seems to bite me in the you-know-what.
by Patricia Busa McConnico [February 2009]
A Friendship Hundredaire »
I’m closing in on 100 “friends” on Facebook. That benchmark forces me to confront a terrible truth. I don’t really have 100 friends.
by TJ Shroat [February 2009]
The 2009 Bum Steer Awards »
It was a year of abbreviated Aggies, bamboozling boxers, charged Cuban, dumb district attorneys, estrogen-packed elevators, famished firemen, graveyard ganja, half-wit husbands, imaginary illegal immigrants, Jessica jests, koncert kayos, lawn-watering Lance, muddled Moron, next-of-kin-offending newspapers, oblivious operators, pornographic prom dresses, questionable quiz takers, repulsive Roger, stolen shih tzus, tasteless team spirit, useless urine, victimized valedictorians, waning W., x-traneous Xmas trees, yelping Yahoo, and zany zoophiles.
by [January 2009]
‘Twas the List Before Christmas »
And my favorite Christmas present of all time is...
by Eileen Smith [January 2009]
What’s in Your Wallet? »
If you decided that 2008 was the year for you to cut yourself off from society, shed all material belongings, live off the land, and grow your own food, then you’ve got a pretty good head start.
by Eileen Smith [December 2008]
Madame Secretary, I Presume? »
Hillary Clinton has served on the Senate Armed Services Committee, visited troops in Afghanistan and Iraq, and successfully dodged hostile (as opposed to agreeable) gunfire in Bosnia.
by Eileen Smith [November 2008]
The 2008 Bum Steer Awards »
It was a year of angry Aggies, Baptist bravado, confused Cheney, death row drollery, enemas in evidence, fetid feet, ghetto gobbledygook, helicopter hunts, insurance idiocy, jerk judges, kin kidnappers, lawbreaking Longhorns, meshuggener misfires, NASA nimrods, Oswald online, pooped-on presidents, quick quarrels, requested roaches, scrotum-scarring Sooners, taped teenagers, unhinged urinators, visible Virgins, weaselly Whole Foods, X-rated x-classmates, yuletide yikes, and zeroed-out zebras.
[January 2008]
The 2007 Bum Steer Awards »
It was a year of aggrieved actors, banned boobs, Cuban commodes, DeLay denial, errant Elmo, frisky floaters, grouchy governors, hung hoopsters, immigration insensitivity, job-seeking judges, klobbered Karl, Longhorn lushes, miffed musicians, nude no-no’s, ousted Osteens, peeved passers, quarreling queens, riled Rangers, subpar sheriffs, tiny “terrorists,” unseemly URLs, vice presidential violence, wiseacre W., x-asperated x-wives, youthful yakkers, and zoo zeal.
[January 2007]
Ron White Gets the Last Laugh »
Thanks to the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, he’s richer than all get-out, and you’re not.
by John Spong [December 2006]
The 2006 Bum Steer Awards »
[January 2006]
Bum Steer Hall of Fame »
In celebration of their lifetime achievements—or lack thereof—we hereby introduce, with great pleasure and big laughs, the first-ever inductees to the brand-new Bum Steer Hall of Fame.
[January 2006]
The Best Bum Steers. Ever. »
We published the first Bum Steer Awards in January 1974, and we haven’t missed a year since. We pored over all 32 installments—and more than 2,500 items—to come up with… the BEST BUM STEERS. EVER.
[January 2006]
Seriously, Folks »
Humorist Rich Malley on being clever, writing headlines, and putting together Bum Steers.
Interview by Leah Fillion [January 2006]
Putting Together the Pieces »
Associate art director T. J. Tucker on co-designing this year’s Bum Steer Awards.
Interview by Lindsay Meeks [January 2006]
The 2006 Bum Steer Awards »
It was a year of appalling Anna Nicole, babbling Bar, conspiring cheerleaders, déclassé DeLay, enraptured Eva, fecal funny business, gubernatorial gaffes, horrifying Hook ’Em, illustrious intoxicators, juggy Jessica, Kinky kocktails, lame lawmakers, misidentified ministers, noticeable nepotism, obnoxious Oberst, powerboating Perot, queer quotes, rude Redskin, stimulated sex offenders, titillating teachers, unwanted urinating, vilified Vancouverites, watered-down Willie, x-asperating Xmas songs, yucky yearbooks, and zinged zip codes.
[January 2006]
Music to My Years »
When did I stop being cool?
by Sarah Bird [June 2005]
Critters And Fritters »
You’d love my collection of vintage Texas cookbooks. Just don’t ask me to cook from them.
by Anne Dingus [June 2005]
Sibling Ribaldry »
Developing my twisted sense of humor was a family affair.
by Sarah Bird [April 2005]
“Confessions of a Skinny Bitch” »
Over the past thirty years, I’ve edited or written more than 28,000 restaurant reviews for this magazine. That’s a lot of crème brûlée under the bridge, folks. So what’s my life been like, exactly? And how have I stayed this thin? Good questions.
by Patricia Sharpe [March 2005]
Message In a Bottle »
Blondness—natural or otherwise— is even more Texan than Big Hair.
by Anne Dingus [February 2005]
Happily Enron After! »
The fairy tale is long over, but reality hasn’t necessarily set in.
by Mimi Swartz [February 2005]
The 2005 Bum Steer Awards »
[January 2005]
Dome Improvement »
How I’ll change life at the Capitol as governor. (Hint: Spaying is involved.)
by Kinky Friedman [January 2005]
Rounding Up the Steers »
Senior editor Anne Dingus on the Bum Steers traditions and mocking those other Simpsons.
Interview by Kimberly Jeffries [January 2005]
The Funnies »
Illustrator Tim Bower, who worked on this month’s cover story, talks about drawing, humor, and his favorite Bum Steer.
Interview by Kimberly Jeffries [January 2005]
The 2005 Bum Steer Awards »
It was a year of: Alamo amour, bollixed Bush, cheeseburger chagrin, dissed Davy, egregious ethics, film flops, guileful gynecologists, hibiscus hullabaloo, in-flight idiocy, jiggling Janet, konservative kross-dressers, laughable liposuction, microphone mishaps, numskull name-nabbing, opinionated obits, pot parfaits, Qaeda qualms, reckless Rather, streaking solons, tasteless Tecate, UT users, vulgar veeps, Wicca watchdogs, X-pensive X-crement, yoga yoke, and—zounds!—zero tolerance.
[January 2005]
L. on Wheels »
Eight days in a rental car with Larry L. King, the crotchety West Texan who has written some of the greatest magazine stories of all time, would be enough to drive anyone crazy. Except his biggest fan.
by John Spong [January 2005]
The Bottom 10 »
For connoisseurs of Bum Steer-worthy behavior, 2004 was an embarrassment of riches. Well, an embarrassment, anyway.
[January 2005]
Keep Gomorrah Weird »
A passionate, pointed, and in retrospect, pot-induced defense of Austin.
by Kinky Friedman [December 2004]
