As weird as the 2006 governor’s race undeniably is, the goals of all four major candidates are remarkably mundane: Rick Perry wants nothing less than to be the longest-serving chief executive in the state’s history; Carole Keeton Strayhorn means to move her “One Tough Grandma” act into the big house across from the Capitol; Chris Bell craves respect, for himself and his depleted party; and Kinky Friedman intends to lead his band of unlikely voters in a rousing chorus of “Adiós, mofo!”
July 1, 2006 | by Paul Burka | Feature
The looming clash between Republican gubernatorial candidates Rick Perry and Kay Bailey Hutchison may not be as fearsome as the storied Ali-Frazier bout, but it’s the heavyweight showdown every Texas political junkie has been waiting for.
February 1, 2009 | by Paul Burka | Politics
A year of avaricious Arabs, belligerent bovines, convincing Connallys, dubious degrees, elusive Elvises, furious firefighters, George’s goofs, hassled Hunts. Ingenious inmates, jilted judges, knotorious Kneppers, loose locomotives, migrant moose, normative nerds, overcautious orchestras, preposterous pythons, qualmish queens, rampant roaches, Sue Ellen’s swimsuits, targeted transvestites, upset umps, vetoed Virgins, wanton Willies, x-tremist x-chairmen, yammering Yankees, and zapped zygomatics.
January 1, 1989 | Feature
A year of alarming art, befuddled bus drivers, crustacean confiscators, demanding donors, entomological eats, feckless felons, garbled George W., hideous headgear, inspirational ice cream, juiced journalists, KKK kiss-offs, Lubbock lampooners, mucho manure, nada nudity, oafish officials, P.O.’d policemen, quirky queens, raunchy Republicans, shapely sideburns, thanatological toys, used uniforms, vampire vanquishers, witless waiters, x-pert x-terminators, yeoman Yankees, and zany zealots.
January 1, 2001 | Feature