Whataburger Is Looking For A Few Good Poets
The beloved burger chain will reward fans who celebrate them in verse.
How do Texans love Whataburger? Let us count the ways. There’s the #2 (double meat Whataburger), #5 (bacon and cheese Whataburger), #10 (Whatachick’n Sandwich), the #25 (Honey Butter Chicken Biscuit) . . . the list goes on. And if celebrating your love of Whataburger in verse is something you enjoy—and why wouldn’t it be?—you can now be rewarded by the restaurant chain for your words.
This week, Whataburger announced the #BurgerVerseContest. It is basically exactly what you think it is—and if you think that Whataburger and poetry don’t go together, consider this viral slam poem tribute out of Houston from a couple years ago. To celebrate National Burger Month, from May 3 to May 24, aspiring poets can tag Whataburger on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter with short poems (remember, poetry is compression) up to 70 words that convey their enthusiasm. In return, aspiring bards have the chance to win free Whataburger for a year and a $500 Ticketmaster gift card.
Poetry is an open-ended form of self-expression without much in the way of formal rules—the work of e.e. cummings and Shel Silverstein have little resemblance to one another—but if you want free burgers, there shall be restrictions on your verse. Specifically, you have to “mention Whataburger or a Whataburger menu item,” avoid profanity, and leave other companies out of it. (On the official rules page, the company goes into greater detail—if your poem references dangerous stunts, you’re paying for your own burgers!) Whataburger’s team will pick their three favorites every week, then turn it over to the audience to vote on social media.
When it comes to the prizes, the winning poets will each receive a coupon book good for 52 single-meat Whataburger sandwiches. (Bacon, cheese, avocado, and other add-ons not included, alas.) If you’re looking for some inspiration to get you started, you can use “top the stuff that Texas Monthly writers posted in a Slack chat” as a launching point:
“The Orange ‘W'”
so much depends
slathered with A.1.
beneath the orange
“This Is Just To Say”
I have eaten
that were in
the Whataburger place
you were probably
they were delicious
and so hot
“Impromptu Haiku Plea For Cheese”
Won’t you give us cheese
If we write you a poem?
We’ll scrounge for fries.
Surely you can do better than this—hashtag ’em with #BurgerVerseContest and you can show them what you’ve got.