The Texanist

The Texanist

Since July 2007, the Texanist has taught many a well-intentioned Texan how to properly conduct him- or herself. Is it ever okay to ask somebody how many acres he has? Is it acceptable to spit tobacco juice at the office? Can one have too many Texas-themed tattoos? Why is Big Red so good? Who knows? Wait, the Texanist does!

The Texanist |
May 23, 2016

The Texanist

Our estimable advice columnist on saying “I do” to a potbellied pig, bidding farewell to supper, giving your regards to Texas, and complaining about cold tortillas.

The Texanist |
April 20, 2016

The Texanist

Forget about Batman vs. Superman. Our advice columnist referees spring vs. fall, Strait vs. Wills, Oatmeal vs. Bacon, and restaurant vs. patron.

The Texanist |
February 24, 2016

The Texanist

Our estimable advice columnist on putting a Tennessean in his place, adding Topo Chico to everything, learning to love a rusty jalopy, and naming Possum Kingdom Lake.

The Texanist |
January 27, 2016

The Texanist

Our estimable advice columnist on the pronunciation of “Fort Worth,” the pros and cons of spring break south of the border, the best way to deal with the brisket illiterate, and the Texan who mistook himself for a Floridian.

The Texanist |
December 23, 2015

The Texanist

Our advice columnist muses on the seeming futility of horse apples, the finer points of knives, the downside of going vegetarian, and whether it’s possible to love a Willie-hater.