Plus, feeling grateful for our gimlet-eyed deputy editor, Jeff Salamon.
Bum Steers
The Austin-based office captured third place for the botched investigation of state representative Dawnna Dukes.
The outgoing congressman takes eighth place for his refusal to face the truth about climate change.
The East Texas congressman takes seventh place for his wack-job debut as an infographic creator.
Our lieutenant governor, for his eagerness to squander his power, waste our time, and drag Texas politics into the bathroom, is our Bum Steer of the Year.
The Mistress of the Elements occupies second place—for being really, really mean to Texas.
The eight infamous Steers celebrated elsewhere in this package had a lot of company this year in our hall of shame. Here are another fifty or so Texans deserving of some ignominy.
Landing in fourth place, the state government’s also-ran loyal opposition, for going missing in action, year after year.
In fifth place: the excitable radio host, for saying so many crazy things that his unsuccessful and very public child custody battle wasn’t the most embarrassing thing that happened to him this year.
Time to double-check the locks on your barns.
We can see how that looks bad.
From arrogant announcers to zany zygotes—and everything in between—it was a banner year for the Bum Steers.
Yeah, we blew it. Our January 2014 Bum Steers cover shows the wrong Astros uniform. So we'll be the first to admit that we deserve a bum steer.
This time he was arrested upon arrival at the airport, after allegedly choking flight attendants and making sexual remarks.
This is no way to revive The Battle of the Brazos: Ennis municipal court judge W. Lee Johnson, a Baylor alumnus, was publicly reprimanded for his none-too-subtle post about the A&M QB’s apparent moving violation.
Audrey Deen Miller was arrested earlier this week in Spring for shooting her husband, who apparently had bad intentions towards one her felines.
Picking up a Houston Chronicle story, the Fort Worth Star-Telegram printed the name of Chron reporter Yang Wang as "Yank Wang." She took it in good stride.
A friend says breast cancer is the reason former El Paso County Judge Dolores Briones helped embezzle money from a program for mentally ill children.
Natalie Plummer's handwritten grocery-bag sign warning motorists near downtown of a speed trap led to her arrest for "walking in the roadway." She claims she never left the sidewalk.
Who is the Bum Steer here? The Houstonian who refused to pay a mandatory tip or the restaurant that allegedly locked her in the establishment and called the police when she wouldn't pay up?
In El Paso, a man suffers a heart attack at the Red Parrot, while in Houston a dancer known as "Pocahontas" is a murder suspect.
A 21-year-old El Paso man was arrested for "pulling an Ozzy" and urinating on the Alamo Saturday night.
Houston Bellaire wide receiver Devin Lauderdale and three friends were supposed to attend the Red Raiders spring football game, but clearly didn't know the way to Lubbock.
Sheriff's deputies arrested 26-year-old Ricardo Luna, who allegedly tried to use crack cocaine as payment for a $10 lap dance at the XTC Cabaret strip club in Austin.
Air conditioning heir John Goodman adopted his 42-year-old girlfriend for legal and financial reasons, but it's still icky.
Texas Monthly senior editor Katy Vine shares a few stories from one of her favorite writers of the year.
We picked. You reacted. Tweets and articles about our Bum Steer of the Year, Governor—and, last time we checked, Republican presidential candidate—Rick Perry.
KHOU ran a story about convicted rapist Abraham Joseph and next to it embedded a Twitter feed populating tweets related to the story. Unfortunately it pulled innocent @abrahamjoseph into its web.
Christopher Erck, owner of the Worm Tequila and Mezcal bar in San Antonio, applied to trademark the phrase, "I can't remember the Alamo," a joke the custodians of the historic structure found none too funny.
A Cowboys fan who claims she was burned by a hot bench outside Cowboys Stadium has sued the team and Jerry Jones.
UPDATE: Judge Lanny Moriarty has vacated Diane Tran's conviction. The Willis High School junior has repeatedly missed school because she also works two jobs.
Due to a proofreading error, the program for Saturday's commencement ceremony at UT's Lyndon B. Johnson School of Public Affairs left out a crucial "L.”
A middle schooler’s playoff tribute to his fellow redhead on the San Antonio Spurs has been deemed a "distraction" by the Judson ISD.
We revisit Sheyla Hershey, the woman from Houston with 38-KKK breasts who is now the subject of an episode of My Strange Addiction.
University of Texas fans are fuming about the photo of a “Horns Down” Longhorn that the Alcalde put up on its website.