The State of Texas: Dec. 9, 2013

Photos of the Day

There were so many great images over the weekend, it was difficult to pick just one. Below are some favorites.

Partial Foods — It’s almost unsurprising that the complacent patrons of Whole Foods would go (organically) bananas at the first sign of possible danger. But who knew they’d also go onions and salad? Either way, that’s exactly what happened when Dallas experienced a little ice over the weekend, with the local Whole Foods ravaged like the apocalypse was at hand.

Shaking Things Up — Despite being rocked by an increasing number of earthquakes in the past few months, it’s nice to know that Azle’s local journalists have a sense of humor. Here’s the masthead of the town’s weekly newspaper, The Azle News (h/t Bud Kennedy).

Take a Knee — Despite getting fired as head coach of the Texans on Thursday, Gary Kubiak decided to leave with his class intact. On Sunday, he bought a full-page ad in the Houston Chronicle, thanking fans for all their support.

Santa Claws — Ole St. Nick has begun his annual publicity tour, including appearances with public figures. And this photo, dubbed “Menacing Santa,” with Rick and Anita Perry is making the Internet rounds:

Daily Roundup

Graded On A Curve — The El Paso ISD has essentially received a D from the Federal government, which said it won’t pursue civil rights violations, despite the massive fraud and scheming. Following an investigation earlier this year, the school district was found to have cheated extensively on its own tests, used for federal funding, primarily by targeting under-performing Mexican immigrant students. Essentially, EPISD was saved by the school bell, the statute of limitations having run out on any possible investigation by the U.S. Department of Education. Except maybe that grade is still pending. The Inspector General’s office indicated it might consider charges and the Department of Education told their case’s main crusader, Representative Beto O’Rourke, that, hey, maybe they can bring more charges after all. “I’m just expecting more out of the Department of Education,” O’Rourke said, sounding like that one teacher you hate to disappoint.

Taking A/The Stand — Travis County District Attorney Rosemary Lehmberg’s kangaroo trial begins today. Not that the proceedings will be completely bogus, simply that everyone will be bouncing on their tails with excitement. Or, as the Austin American-Statesman put it, “The trial is expected to draw large numbers of spectators, from Lehmberg supporters and detractors to impartial observers who want to witness the novelty of a trial to remove an elected official from office under a rarely used Texas law.” Lehmerg, of course, had pleaded guilty to drunk driving charges, which wouldn’t be the worst thing a prosecutor or politician has ever done, except she oversees the Public Integrity Unit that’s been going after Team Perry. What followed was a lot of political fighting and retribution in full view of the public. So, the trial should be interesting to say the least. Bring your popcorn.

The Captain Has Turned Off The ‘Lawsuit’ Sign — Forth Worth-based American Airlines’s long-awaited merger with US Airways has been cleared for takeoff by none other than the U.S. Supreme Court. Thirty-nine passengers/plaintiffs had requested the courts block the merger, citing their hopes of bringing an antitrust lawsuit. After numerous delays, their litigious hopes were finally grounded for good, as the merger is expected to close today. The merger will make American Airlines the largest carrier in the U.S.

Unsurprising Consequences — As one could have easily—and historically—predicted, preventing women from having access to abortion facilities hasn’t stopped the need or demand for such practices. According to the Associated Press, “the physician who runs an abortion clinic in Corpus Christi says his patient load has tripled since similar clinics in the Rio Grande Valley have closed because of tougher state-imposed restrictions.” If this keeps up, can we expect a massive, Romanian-sized crime wave in about eighteen years?

Party Bowls — It was a good week for some Texas college teams (sorry, Longhorns!). Texas A&M is a bunch of chickens. And now that they’re going to the Fiesta Bowl as the state’s number one team, you should quit making fun of Baylor. Then there’s Rice, (excitedly) going to the Liberty Bowl after their first Conference USA title in more than fifty years, a game that also included a penis or four.