QUOTE OF THE DAY


“I woke up and wasn’t really feeling good. I came to shootaround, went through shootaround, got back to the room and thought maybe I needed to rest. About 15 minutes later, I woke up and everything started coming out. Both ends.”

—San Antonio Spurs’ Dewayne Dedmon to reporters after practice on Monday, according to the San Antonio Express-News. The seven-footer certainly wasn’t shy about his, uh, symptoms that forced him to miss Game 4 of the Spurs’ playoff series against the Memphis Grizzlies on Saturday. Dedmon’s good to go now, and will be back in action for Game 5 on Tuesday night. 


BIG NEWS


     

Spencer Platt/Getty

Uneasy Rider
It took them both long enough, but Uber and Lyft have finally responded to the so-called “sex” amendment added last week to a statewide ride-hailing bill. Last Wednesday, the Texas House easily passed House Bill 100, which would overturn local regulations on ride-hailing services like Uber and Lyft, opening the door for their potential return to cities like Austin, where both companies left in a huff last year after a vote on regulations regarding fingerprinting and background checks on drivers didn’t go their way. But there was a strange catch to HB 100. Arlington Republican Tony Tinderholt took the opportunity to add an amendment that defines “sex” as the “physical condition of being male or female.” The amendment drew sharp criticism from House Democrats, though Tinderholt denied that his intentions behind the rider were in any way discriminatory. “The bottom line is there’s no huge reason behind it. I just wanted to clarify,” Tinderholt told the Texas Tribune last week. “The amendment was simply for clarification. It’s really, truly that simple.” Uber and Lyft were both mum until Monday, when both hammered the amendment but stopped short of disavowing the entire bill or withdrawing their support. “We are disappointed that this unnecessary amendment was added to legislation that should be focused on adopting a consistent statewide framework for ride sharing,” Uber spokesman Travis Considine said, according to the Tribune. “Uber’s comprehensive national nondiscrimination policy will not change.” Lyft spokesman Chelsea Harrison said, “The adopted amendment is unnecessary, as Lyft’s strong nondiscrimination policy remains in effect no matter what local or state statutes exist.”


MEANWHILE, IN TEXAS


ICE Cold
U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents hit Texas with another massive raid, scooping up 95 undocumented immigrants living near Houston last week, according to the Houston Chronicle. Thirteen of those arrested in the raids had no prior criminal record. “The importance is to secure our communities,” Bret Bradford, acting field office director for Houston, told the Chronicle. “There’s bipartisan support for getting these folks off the street.” Similar large-scale raids have hit Austin and Dallas–Fort Worth in the past few months, but this is the first big one in Houston since President Donald Trump’s executive actions enabling immigration enforcement agencies to crack down on people living here without documentation. According to the Chronicle, ICE failed to provide many details about this latest raid, which went down in a five-day period beginning April 17. People were arrested in Brazoria, Fort Bend, Galveston, Harris, Liberty, Matagorda, Montgomery, and Wharton counties.

Whole Sale
Prepare for the Whole Foods apocalypse: the popular chain may soon be sold to another grocery store chain. Citing anonymous sources, Financial Times reported on Monday that the supermarket chain Albertsons is exploring taking over Whole Foods, and the company is so smitten with the Austin-based chain that it has already had preliminary talks with bankers about making a bid. Albertsons became the third-largest supermarket chain in the country after it bought Safeway for $9 billion last year, so it’s a big enough player to make a move on Whole Foods. The Boise, Idaho-based Albertsons, of course, doesn’t quite cater to the same uppity and hip corner of the market that Whole Foods has laid claim to, meaning the steady kombucha supply could be in flux.

Just Desserts—Austinite and Infowars host Alex Jones can’t catch a break. Jones has made headlines since last week amid a contentious child custody battle in Travis County, and now he appears to have found himself yet another enemy: big yogurt. Greek yogurt giant Chobani filed a defamation lawsuit against Jones in Idaho state court on Monday, stemming from articles and videos published by Jones and Infowars that falsely linked Chobani to child rape and a tuberculosis outbreak near its plant in Twin Falls, according to the Washington Post. The complaint alleges Jones’s website ran a series of stories that claimed Chobani and owner Hamdi Ulukaya hired refugee workers who brought crime and disease to Twin Falls, and suggested the yogurt company was responsible for a “500% increase in tuberculosis” in the Idaho town. That’s obviously false, but a court will determine whether it’s also defamatory. Meanwhile, Jones bragged in his latest Infowars video over the weekend that he’d slept with “probably 150 women, or more” before he’d turned sixteen, according to the Austin American-Statesman. Sure you did, Jonesy.


WHAT WE’RE READING


Some links are paywalled or subscription-only.

A must-read about the Aryan Brotherhood, drugs, and the female CI who brought the house down Dallas Morning News

This seven-year-old’s bedtime kept her from testifying before the bathroom bill hearing, so here’s what she wanted to say Texas Tribune

The Twenty-third Congressional District of Texas is ripe for a Democratic challenger Washington Post

Meet Copy Cat, the fifteen-year-old kitty clone still kicking it in College Station Bryan Eagle

A Seattle high school flew in a nineteen-year-old running back from Beaumont just for the season, then gave him the boot after Thanksgiving Seattle Times