Tweet Of The Day

The man below has either incredible foresight or a complete lack of it. Only time (and a lot of prayers) will tell:

Engagement Thursday

Dallas couple TJ Mundell and Timmy Patterson’s engagement photos are a viral hit thanks to their “unhealthy obsession” with Doctor Who. The couple went all out for the shoot, which they staged in a Deep Ellum warehouse and includes a custom-made TARDIS (FYI, uninitiated, that is a time machine from the show):

Daily Roundup

On Guard — Governor Rick Perry visited a National Guard training facility in Bastrop Wednesday to check up on his border troops, where he engaged in the kind of saber-rattling rhetoric that would make General Patton proud. “You now are the tip of the spear protecting Americans from these cartels,” Perry told the troops, according to the Associated Press. “As they are able to get past you they could be headed to any city, any neighborhood in this country, spreading their tentacles of crime, of fear.” They, of course are the “narco-terrorists,” a group Perry has invoked in a few other speeches about the crisis. But, according to the AP report, the data Perry uses to back up his claims that drug-related violence is a significant threat doesn’t actually support that case. Perry went on to assure the crowd that this was not a political play. “The idea that what we’re doing is politics versus protecting the people of Texas, the people of this country is just false on its face.”

Hotel Walmart — Back in the old days, when a kid ran away from home he went to his friend’s house, or even a hike to the county line. Now? Walmart has all the amenities for a few-nights stay. “A teenager lived undetected for two days at a 24-hour Walmart [in Corsicana] after running away from his aunt’s home,” according to the AP. “When employees found the fourteen-year-old stepping outside his temporary shelter in the baby apparel section, they found “a number of items … indicating the teen had been staying awhile. … The boy pilfered food and drinks from the store and changed clothes periodically to avoid detection.” While the boy’s effort isn’t quite as impressive as those who lived in a Walmart parking lot for weeks or months on end, his impressively sneaky vacation—”He created a crack in the back wall of the drink aisle to grab juice and even collected a fish from the pet department“—has garnered national headlines.

Some Lite Debate — The race for governor might be all but a done deal (“It’s over,” says Texas Monthly‘s own Paul Burka), but at least there’s still some fireworks to be had in the lieutenant governor race. The two candidates, state sentators Dan Patrick and Leticia Van de Putte, have agreed to debate. And like any high-profile debate, the process is moving like molasses. Although they’ve agree on the obvious, they “haven’t settled on a date,” reports the Austin American-Statesman. If the pre-debate daggers are indication, this could be a lot of fun. Van de Putte askd for a total of five debates and isn’t afraid to call Patrick out: “Texans know a coward when they see one,” she wrote in a campaign announcement. According to KXAN, the one yet-to-be-scheduled one will take place either September 24 or September 27.

Time-Breakers —The headline from KHOU is just wonderful: “Texas town finds 1930s time capsule, unsure how to open it.” To be fair, it’s a bit more complicated than that. “Demolition crews recovered a time capsule in Taylor dating back more than 75 years. Crews found the capsule while knocking down the old City Hall building on Main Street.The capsule was placed inside City Hall’s foundation when the building was first built in 1935.” The reason for the difficulty in opening the box is that the “10x8x5 inch copper box is tightly packed” and expertly sealed shut. Officials don’t want to use a torch to open it since that could damage possible documents inside. The latest idea? A can opener, “although there’s no obvious edge to start at.” City officials said they hope to figure out a solution in time for a fall reveal.

Clickity Bits

The Alamo Drafthouse Is Goin’ Hollywood

Just How Bad Is the Toby Keith Restaurant?

The Two Least-Friendly LGBT Schools in Texas, U.S.

Gunman Wanted To Create The Nation of ‘Dougiestan’

Know Who’s Burning All Those Flags? Win A Prize!

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