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Meanwhile, in Texas . . .

Some crazy stuff went down in Texas in the past thirty days. Here are some of the headlines you may have missed.

By February 2017Comments

Illustration by Ross MacDonald

  • A couple from The Woodlands got married after dating for 41 years.
  • The Duncanville High School women’s basketball team beat Grand Prairie High School 91–1.
  • Two Midlanders returned a Purple Heart to the family of its late owner after it was found in a dumpster.
  • A 15-year-old was caught near Los Indios driving a vehicle carrying $1.1 million worth of marijuana.
  • Some families who waited more than two hours to see Santa in Fort Worth’s Sundance Square were turned away shortly before closing time.
  • A 20-year-old in Dallas drove his dad’s Aston Martin into a lake.
  • A white man in Denton claimed vandals painted a racial slur on his garage and burned his motorcycle, and then later admitted that he’d done it himself.
  • Seventy-two bronze vases were stolen from grave markers at a McLennan County cemetery.
  • Police evacuated a Walmart in Forney because of a suspected explosive device, only to discover that it was a toy confetti bomb.
  • Waco’s Cameron Park Zoo created a baby registry and held a baby shower for two expecting orangutans.
  • A fourth grader in Georgetown won $1,000 for growing a twenty-pound cabbage.
  • An El Paso man was chosen to compete in a Food Network show called Worst Cooks in America.

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