David Courtney, Contributor at Texas Monthly

A Temple native, David Courtney is a graduate of the University of Texas at Austin. He joined Texas Monthly in October 2005 and in July 2007 debuted his wildly popular advice column, the Texanist, regularly the magazine’s most-read feature.

In 2017, the University of Texas Press published The Texanist: Fine Advice on Living in Texas, and in 2019, Fox Entertainment optioned the column with plans to develop a television show based on it. As the Texanist and as himself, Courtney has contributed his talents to such endeavors as the annual Bum Steer Awards, the quinquennial review of the fifty best barbecue joints in Texas, “The 50 Greatest Hamburgers in Texas,” “The 40 Best Small-Town Cafes,” and “Snap Judgment,” a compilation of the ten greatest plays in Texas college football, as well as “The Beachcomber,” for which he walked the entire 65-mile length of Padre Island National Seashore, and “Water, Water Everywhere,” for which he swam buck naked in Lake Travis, outside of Austin.

Featured Articles

texanist town names

The Texanist: How Do You Pronounce All Those Weird Texas Town Names?

A Dallas man is flummoxed by Quitaque. And Danevang, and Jiba, and Study Butte, and Zuehl . . .

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Padre Island National Seashore

Travel & Outdoors

A Four-Day, 65-Mile Walk Along the Texas Coast

As the state started shutting down, one man took to the coast in search of a different kind of solitude. And seashells.

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The Texanist: What’s So Great About the Shape of Texas?

A Boerne woman wonders if other Americans are as smitten as we are with the outlines of their states.

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texanist time zones

The Texanist: Can We Put El Paso Back in the Central Time Zone?

A West Texas man seems to be tired of living on Mountain Standard Time.

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The Texanist on fire ant bites.

The Texanist: To Pop or Not to Pop Fire Ant Bites?

How to handle the zit-sized pustule that those evil little @$*!%*#@%&!s leave behind.

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Snap Judgment

Raise a Pearl beer to our ten greatest college football plays. Ever.

By Texas Monthly

The Texanist: What Would the World Be Like if Willie Nelson Had Never Happened?

An Austin man ponders the unthinkable.

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texanist at the capitol

The Texanist: Has There Ever Been Any Violence at the Texas Capitol?

The recent, terrifying events in Washington have an Austin man wondering about mayhem closer to home.

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The Texanist: Tell Me About This Magical Thing Called Texas Toast

A New York man wants to know everything there is to know about Texas toast.

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309 Articles

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May 16, 2023

The Texanist: What’s the Oldest Bar in Texas?

An Austin man wants to know whether Austin’s Scholz Garten or San Antonio’s Menger Bar can claim the title of oldest continually operating bar in the state.

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texanist boy girl names

April 11, 2023

The Texanist: Why Do So Many Texas Women Have Men’s Names?

A New Mexico resident is puzzled by all the female Jimmies and Johnnies.

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April 10, 2023

A Writer Revisits His Search for His Grandfather’s Darkest Secrets

Author John Phillip Santos’s 2010 “Tejano elegy” explores family secrets that reveal “the deepest mysteries of being human.”

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April 7, 2023

The Texanist’s Quiz of Texcentric Trivialities

Are you ready to test your knowledge of all things Texan?

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Meanwhile in Texas Longest Basketball Shot

Meanwhile in Texas|

April 7, 2023

Meanwhile, in Texas: A Man Broke a Basketball Record You Didn’t Know Existed

Plus, somebody slapped an H-E-B employee and nobody opened a satanic-themed hotel in Plano.

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March 24, 2023

Her Grandfather Dug For Fossils in Big Bend. Now Her Photos Celebrate His Spirit of Adventure.

Sarah Wilson's ‘DIG’ combines photos, her grandfather’s Kodachrome teaching slides, and creatively staged paleontological artifacts.

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taco license plate texanist april 2023

March 14, 2023

The Texanist: What Makes a Vanity License Plate Offensive?

A Port Arthur resident wants to know what’s wrong with “BBQ*GNG” and “[email protected]”

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meanwhile in texas goat go to target

Meanwhile in Texas|

March 10, 2023

Meanwhile, in Texas: Two Goats Made a Target Run in Spring

Plus, a man stole tamarin monkeys from the Dallas Zoo and creepy-looking snapper eels turned up near Port Bolivar.

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Arts & Entertainment|

February 27, 2023

Author John Graves Was a Literary Godfather to Texas Monthly

The author of Goodbye to a River and two-time National Book Award finalist helped create the magazine’s Country Notes column.

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February 15, 2023

The Evolution of the Texanist, According to the Texanist

The magazine’s back-page columnist explains the subtle shifts in his “Fine Advice and Keen Observations,” from 2007 through today.

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texanist pink granite

February 14, 2023

The Texanist: Did the Texas Capitol’s Pink Granite Come From Maine?

A San Antonio man is puzzled by a historical marker he encountered while visiting the Pine Tree State.

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texanist crystal ball

January 17, 2023

The Texanist: What Will Texas Look Like Fifty Years From Now?

Some tasty lab-grown barbecue and a Dallas Cowboys postseason appearance may be in our distant future.

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texas beer party

January 17, 2023

The Texas Beer Industry Is Bubbling Over

We still love our Shiner, Pearl, and Lone Star, but our options are now bubbling over, thanks to hundreds of craft breweries across the state.

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texanist january extreme drought weather

December 13, 2022

The Texanist: Will We Get Relief From the Drought Anytime Soon?

A Johnson City man is worried that life is starting to resemble Elmer Kelton’s ‘The Time It Never Rained’ once again.

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honorary Texan december 2022 texanist

November 15, 2022

The Texanist: How Do You Become an Honorary Texan?

A Plano man wonders how the likes of Bob Dylan, Sarah Palin, and John Wayne qualified for this prestigious designation.

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Texanist at a vineyard pouring wine

October 18, 2022

The Texanist: Do We Really Want Texas to Be “Wine Country”?

A Lubbock woman isn’t sure the state’s wildly successful vineyards fit with our Wild West image.

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Point/Counterpoint on Crunchy Tacos

October 6, 2022

The Great Hard-shell Taco Debate

Two Texas Monthly writers go head-to-head on the merits and inferiorities of tacos made with crispy shells vs. soft tortillas.

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texanist six flags visitors center

September 13, 2022

The Texanist: Why Have the Six Flags Disappeared?

An Amarillo man is unhappy that the iconic banners no longer fly in front of the Texas Travel Information Centers.

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texanist three name theater marquee

August 16, 2022

The Texanist: Does a Texas Musician Need Three Names to Succeed?

A Fredericksburg man wonders how Willie Nelson ever prevailed in a state that brought us Ray Wylie Hubbard, Jerry Jeff Walker, and Jimmie Dale Gilmore.

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July 29, 2022

The Texanist: Why Do Texans Call a Pig in a Blanket a Kolache?

A Lone Star State native living in Chicago insists that only small pastry squares filled with cooked fruit deserve that name.

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texanist pink guayabera

July 19, 2022

The Texanist: Would a Real Man Wear a Pink Guayabera?

A Houston woman is miffed by her boyfriend’s reaction to a thoughtful gift.

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texanist tipping at a barbecue joint

June 21, 2022

The Texanist: How Much Should You Tip at a Barbecue Joint?

An Austin man wonders if the people who stand behind a counter and take our orders deserve the same remuneration as the waiters and waitresses of the world.

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rio grande river

Travel & Outdoors|

June 21, 2022

Paddling Down the Rio Grande in the Shadow of a Drought

My dream of navigating through Big Bend’s stunning canyons finally came true. I just had to start a little farther downstream.

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June 6, 2022

The Texanist: Would There Be a ‘Top Gun: Maverick’ Without Texas?

Moviegoers have returned to theaters in droves to see the long-awaited sequel—and we have Texas to thank.

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Texanist golden goose cowboy boots

May 17, 2022

The Texanist: Will Fancy Italian Cowboy Boots Hurt My Texan Bona Fides?

An Austinite living in Washington, D.C., worries about the consequences of sporting pricey designer footwear.

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texanist el paso el chuco

April 12, 2022

The Texanist: Why Is El Paso Known as El Chuco?

A San Antonio man wonders how Sun City got its other nickname and learns about the nicknames of many other Texas cities.

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texanist difference between ranch and farm

March 16, 2022

The Texanist: What’s the Difference Between a Ranch and a Farm?

A New Braunfels man isn’t quite sure that he has a firm grasp on this fundamental aspect of Texas rural life.

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Coming of Redneck Hip Jan Reid Don Roth

February 16, 2022

The Story Behind the Story: “The Coming of Redneck Hip,” November 1973

A pair of Texas Monthly writers chronicle an emerging scene that would end up defining a city and changing American music forever.

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texanist goes to hollywood

February 16, 2022

The Texanist: What Movies Get Texas Really, Really Wrong?

As it turns out, even the best films and TV shows about the Lone Star State have their share of gaffes. (Yes, even ‘Lonesome Dove.’)

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texanist tex-mex scientist

January 18, 2022

The Texanist: What’s the Difference Between Tex-Mex and Mexican Food?

A transplant from California wades into an age-old culinary debate.

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texanist pastries

January 6, 2022

The Texanist: Why Doesn’t Texas Have an Official State Pastry?

A Fort Worth woman wants to know why we honor the bluebonnet and the pecan tree, but not the strudel or the sopaipilla.

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christmas DJ texanist

December 6, 2021

The Texanist: What’s the Best Texas Christmas Song?

An El Paso woman is looking for the finest example of Lone Star holiday musical jollity. But can there only be one?

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November 4, 2021

The Texanist: Where Did All These Bright Green Parrots Come From?

A longtime San Antonio resident is thrilled—but puzzled—by the presence of monk parakeets in her hometown.

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October 15, 2021

The Texanist: Is Freezing Brisket a Mortal Sin?

An Arlington man wonders if his penny-wise buddy is being barbecue-foolish.

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September 24, 2021

Big Tex on State Fair History, His Favorite Fried Foods, and His Size 96 Boots

A conversation with the big guy himself.

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September 17, 2021

The Texanist: If You’re Not a Fan of Fruitcake and Canned Chili, What’s So Great About Corsicana?

A man now living in Fredericksburg wonders if his hometown really has anything to brag about.

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September 7, 2021

The Texanist: Now That the Longhorn-Aggie Rivalry Is Back, Can UT and A&M Alums Stay Friends?

Two Texas buddies stationed at an Air Force base in Qatar wonder if their bond can survive the SEC’s recent expansion.

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August 12, 2021

The Texanist: Is It Okay to Wear Cowboy Boots With Cuffed Trousers?

A Eulogy man wants to make sure that his footwear and pants-wear choices are compatible.

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texanist gun at a dinner party

July 28, 2021

The Texanist: Is It OK to Bring a Gun to a Dinner Party?

A Plano woman doesn't think pistol-packing goes with pasta primavera.

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texanist town names

July 14, 2021

The Texanist: How Do You Pronounce All Those Weird Texas Town Names?

A Dallas man is flummoxed by Quitaque. And Danevang, and Jiba, and Study Butte, and Zuehl . . .

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July 6, 2021

The Texanist: Am I the Only Person Seeing a Lot More Bugs This Summer?

A very wet spring has a San Antonio woman looking for some relief from an arthropod invasion.

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June 14, 2021

The Texanist: Is There a Formula for Picking Out a Cowboy Hat That Doesn’t Make You Look Like a Fool?

A Houston man wants to get the width of his brim just right.

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rain-hating boyfriend texanist

May 26, 2021

The Texanist: What Should I Do About My Rain-Hating Boyfriend?

A Brady woman isn't sure her new relationship will survive a fundamental disagreement about the weather.

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The texanist meets a telemarketer robot

May 12, 2021

The Texanist: Why Do I Get So Many Robocalls From Small Texas Towns?

A Houston woman wants to know why the fine folks in Granger just won't leave her alone.

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April 26, 2021

The Texanist: Might I Be Related to One of the Most Famous Figures in Texas History?

A Fort Worth resident wants to know if the stepson of a descendant of Moses Austin can call himself the great-great-great-great-great-step-grandson of the Father of the Father of Texas.

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Texanist in Greer County

April 12, 2021

The Texanist: Do You Miss the Texas County That Is Now Part of Oklahoma?

A man from the Sooner State has a question about the other Red River Rivalry.

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March 28, 2021

The Texanist: Is Wichita Falls the Only Place Where People Put Tomato Juice in Their Beer?

A Waxahachie man is trying to gauge the popularity of the "red draw."

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March 15, 2021

The Texanist: Wait, Is Tennessee Suddenly More Popular Than Texas?

A Kansas woman is puzzled by some recent data about the Volunteer State and the Lone Star State.

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illustration of the Texanist, in a sea of tortilla chips

March 8, 2021

The Texanist: Why Are Mexican Restaurants in San Antonio Charging for Chips and Salsa?

A River City man isn’t happy about paying for what used to be free.

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texanist time zones

March 1, 2021

The Texanist: Can We Put El Paso Back in the Central Time Zone?

A West Texas man seems to be tired of living on Mountain Standard Time.

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